My house was still in shambles from the attack, but we did manage
to have a new maroon door put on the next day . It was
sort of funny how glad I was to have a door that looked more like something I would have chosen, rather than the copy and paste one that came
with the house. It even had a smaller iron door in place of a normal keyhole.
The rest of the destruction was, miraculously, minimal. The chandelier was in pieces, which we replaced with a cheaper garage sale version. The book shelves had been knocked over, but only one of the individual shelves had actually broken. Some of my favorite 99 cent store "dust collectors" had been smashed to dust, by what ever power Earl had been using. The only thing that I was extremely sad to lose was a bejeweled box that carried an authentic dream-catcher. It was said to be several decades old and was given to me by a kindred spirit that I met while visiting Colorado in 1999.
Even though the house was slowly getting back to normal, every thing with my husband was extremely strained. We used to be able to sit in silence quite comfortably, but now every moment felt awkward and painful. The only peace came when we had to go to work. We would mechanically kiss goodbye and we would go our separate ways, each wishing we could stay and talk but also glad there was no time for things that would remain unsaid.
I was sure the week was never going to end, as each minute moved forward I could swear another two minutes moved backward.
Through all the tears of the broken things, my husband tried to be patient, waiting for me to tell him the real story of what happened that day with Earl. I wanted to tell him everything...at least the parts I remembered. How do you gently say, "I'm not the woman you thought I was, here's who I really am" without a lot of potential screaming. It wasn't that I was afraid of him harming me, I just didn't want to lose him. I didn't want him to think my love for him was as fake as the person that I was pretending to be. Truth is, after 20 years with no contact, I've been wondering for a long time if this "calling" was really what I wanted to do or who I wanted to be. I just couldn't be sure anymore, but I also couldn't see a way out of telling my husband either. So, a week after "the incident" with Earl, I decided it was time to let him in on my...secret.
"Love, I have something to tell you." I said as I sat down beside him while he was reading (his favorite) book. He looked up from his book and let out sigh as if to say, finally, I have been waiting for this, as he said,
"I'm listening."
I took his hand and walked him over to a little picture frame with a key inside. The key was glued to a paper backing and above it had an inscription that said,"You Have The Key To My Heart" written in old style black script.
I pulled the picture frame off the wall and opened up the back, and gently pulled out the key. He looked at me, puzzled, but did not say a word.
"Okay so...what ever I am about to show you please remember that I love you with all my heart..." as I took his hand in mine I added, "and don't freak out." I tried to give him a confident, loving smile but I was pretty sure it just looked awkward and forced.
"just breath," I told myself as we walked towards on of the empty, extra, spare rooms. I opened up the mirrored closet door and started to clean up all the boxes that were strewn all over the floor. Finally after a little "digging" I uncovered a small, black door that was about the size of my hand. I turned my glass ring around in my finger and laid my palm gently on the door. My heart and mind became one as I thought of all the hopes and dreams that I had as a child. The ring sprang to life in my hand, and soon the door changed from pitch black to glowing blue. As the blue essence seeped within the door frame and the scroll work, the door turned a deep shade of red with gold filigree around the frame and a blue emblem in the middle of the door. The blue emblem, that looked like a blue pearl caught in a net, continued to glow as the rest of the door returned to normal.
I stole a quick glance at my husband who seemed not to be breathing as he stared at the door. I could see the wonder in his eyes and tried to envision how all of this new information was going to effect him. I wondered for a moment if he would faint, yell, or panic...or maybe he would do a mixture of all three. He caught me looking at him and whispered, almost inaudibly, "finally."
"Um...what," I said.
"sorry, did I distract you?" he questioned
"no, I just thought I would take this slowly...for you." I added "are you okay?"
He simply nodded as he looked back at the door. Maybe it was the way the glowing light hit my husband's square framed glasses, but he seemed to have this intense and somewhat sinister look on his face.
I mumbled, "okay, moving forward," as I took the key and put it in the middle of the emblem. The door had no hole, yet as I pushed the key in, the door gave way freely. I opened the door and my husband let out a deep breath as there was nothing but white wall behind the door.
